YO, CHRIST!

 Dear The Curmudgeon's Agony Aunt

For some time now I have an overwhelming urge to consume human flesh.

The craving generally starts later in the week, about Thursday and builds up alarmingly until, by Saturday evening I'm going out of my mind with lust and hunger and am desperate for Sunday morning to come around. On Sunday mornings I'm able to satisfy the craving and the clawing, crawling sensations in my stomach disappear until the following week. I feel fulfilled for a while and can calm down and communicate generally well with others (at least for a few days).

More recently, in addition to this impure and unnatural craving I find that my mind is being taken over by another being - one that talks in another tongue. At first I learned this tongue, which turned out to be a dead language once used extensively a couple of millennia ago, in order to understand what the being was telling me. Now I find that this language is taking over my communication and I use it when among others much to their consternation.

Am I going crazy?

 - Catherine O'Lick.

Dear Cath

Yes, you're nuts. Get a life.

- The Curmudgeon's Agony Aunt.