CAR ROUSES

Dear Curmudgeon's Agony Aunt,

Recently Ive found myself trawling through the news looking for reports of plane crashes erthqakes tornades and other god made disaasters - bless him . ,

I have bilt a model racetrack in the back garden that reasembles a motorway complex. To make it reel Ive sawn up the models of cars into pieces  like wot Ive saw on the news. This gives me an immense, sorry this gives me immense pleasure and I wonder why I didnt do this years before I realized that this gives me immense pleasure.

Is there something wrong with me?

- Crass Bandy Old Coot.

Dear Crash

Yes, there is something wrong with you. Don't you know by now that there is no god? And, please watch your grammar and spelling. It's the little things that are important.

Yours, 

The Curmudgeon's Agony Aunt.